The first time I said a truly and definitive no to a request that clearly shouldn't have even been asked was so liberating I just had to do it again - five years later. LOL. But let me tell you, this most recent no, while at first gave me serious heart palpitations, was just as freeing if not more so than the first. I just hope it won't be another five years before I get the chance to assert how much I value my well-being! Maybe if I remember these six results of standing up for myself and then not being worried about thinking of an excuse as to why, my next time won't feel so fretful. Learn who you areWhen you say a quick no to weekend plans, you open up a world of possibilities you may not have known about. That park you always wanted to read your book at or that brewery at the boardwalk by your home that has the best turkey burger. It could even mean you recuperating from a crazy work week by getting a good sleep. Say yes to yourself and in the long run you'll feel emotionally and mentally stable; while also giving you a chance to learn more about who you are and who you want to be paving the way to a self-assured you. becoming Brave, Confident and independentThe two examples of me saying no in the introduction to this post? Those were said to people who I put into the category of "frenemy" or "Small Dose Friends". You know, the ones that will run roughshod over you if you let them? Distancing yourself from those negative energies that zap you dry will make you a stronger person. Be brave and confident and let them know you are a person with feelings, too. Assert your independence. Respect yourselfThere is nothing wrong with wanting to please the right people. I repeat: THE RIGHT PEOPLE. And even there's a limit to doing that. But that limit aside, we are all entitled to a certain amount of respect. Saying yes to any and every things means you don't respect your own well-being or your time. Individuals in your life can pick up on that subconsciously and therefore not respect you as well. Break out the Aretha if you need a fun reminder about the word RESPECT. less stress and more timeThere are moments where I dread the anticipation leading up to an event that I prematurely said yes to. So much so that I literally have a quick dance party if the plans eventually fall through. But imagine if I had initially said no. How much my stress level wouldn't have shot through the roof? How much time I would have saved if I hadn't been planning some excuse to get me out of it? All that time could have been devoted to something I personally wanted to do on "me time". burnoutFeeling burned out makes you feel lousy. Duh! Personally, I'd rather feel burned out from working productively, blogging, or hell, even crying over yet another guy who didn't notice me - but that's a different topic for another blog. You never want to feel burned out from something you could have controlled if you had thought about what YOU had wanted a little bit more Prioritize your prioritiesWhat are YOUR priorities? Every time someone asks you for/to do something, 9 times out of 10, it has to do with what they want or how it would benefit them (remember those "small dose friends"). When you say no, you leave the door open for what you consider more of a priority! Restructuring your resume? Say no to going to the bar to watch the basketball game. Trying to eat better and don't want to gorge on chips and salsa at On The Border? It's alright! And the friends that matter to you and care about you will understand. ** No articles were "harmed" in the making of this post. Got to love experience, right? ** Why No "Why?"So you said no to plans with a group of friends? What's next is the dreaded, "Well, why not?". The automatic defensive response you want to give is, "Because I said so." But you know what's an even more powerful response than that?!
Silence. A "why" isn't always needed and us as females almost always are expected to give a reason or an excuse to pardon why your "no" was given. Just don't. Men aren't expected to. So why should we? So the next time a "why?" or "why not?" is asked, try empowering yourself by not responding! An internal "no!" so to speak.
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